welcome back


the last time we met

we were dead


we were in heaven 

and everything and everyone was a bright beautiful spring green


life is a dream so we meet again

but this time we meet in the past


we go backwards into the future

to a moment when everything was freer and finer than anything we ever imagined


to the moment when everything was bright white and crystal clear

and the air was so clean and so dry that it felt like it could snap


we go backwards into the future

to the moment just after he said i think i hope it will be quick


we go backwards into the future

to the moment just before

the wind tore the hat from his head

tore the gloves from his hands

tore the scarf from his neck

tore the coat, sweater and shirt from his back

tore the shoes and socks from his feet

tore the pants from his legs

tore the t-shirt from his chest

and tore the underpants from his crotch


to the moment just before

he was crying,

he was drooling,

he was sweating,

he was pissing,

he was shitting,

he was cumming,

he was going

and he was gone



to the moment just before

the sounds left his ears

the sights left his eyes

the smells left his nose

the tastes left his mouth

the feelings left his body


to the moment just before

the wind tore the hair from his head

sapped and sucked the color from his skin

peeled the skin from his muscles

pulled the muscles from his bones.

ripped his bones from his being


to the moment just before

the air left his lung

the blood left his veins

the beat left his heart


to the moment just before

the bright white light

seared his ears

scorched his eyes

toasted his nose

burned his tongue

and set fire to his body



life is a dream

so take off your hat

your gloves

your scarves

your jackets

your shirts and your undershirts

your shoes

your socks

your pants

and your underpants


help me to remember when everything was bright white and crystal clear

and the air was so clean and so dry that it felt like it could snap



the day he was born the sky was a bright beautiful vivid blue

everything was ice cold, bright white and crystal clear


bright white sunlight was streaming, screaming and yelling at the snow

the snow was streaming, screaming and yelling the light back into the sky


from the day he was born

he sounded like a prince

looked like a super hero

smelled like a warrior

tasted like a god

and felt like an angel


his legs were like thick veiny roots

his torso was like a stout gnarly trunk

his arms were like blood engorged branches

his hands were like soft floppy leaves

his face was like a placid delicate flower

his fantasies, fears, desires, and anxieties were like over ripe fruit


throughout his life

his roots gnawed voraciously through black soil and burning orange liquid

his trunk grew layers of golden rings

his branches flowed from his heart and wended their way into every conceivable direction

his leaves waved freely in the open air and drank in the sun

his flowers burst open with whispering words and melodies

his fruit dropped to the ground in a giddy free fall of abandon

his seeds dropped and planted themselves

along his mad and endless quest to define and defend his own sense of freedom


the day he died he put on his under pants

his undershirt

his pants

his socks and shoes

his shirt, sweater and jacket

his scarf

his gloves and his hat


he went outside and sat waist deep in snow under his favorite naked tree


the sky was a bright beautiful vivid blue

everything was ice cold, bright white and crystal clear


and the air was so clean and so dry

that it felt like it could snap at any moment and shatter into pieces


and he waited


listening to his final breath 

listening for his name

hearing  a choir of angels

seeing everything and everyone

looking back on a colorful past

looking forward to a bright white future

looking for a sign

looking at a void

smelling potential

tasting  fear and feeling alive



and he died


sensing that something really big was happening

reaching for air

touching his heart

and

grasping his moment

when the wind

tore the hat from his head

the gloves from his hands

the scarf from his neck

the coat, sweater and shirt from his back

the shoes and socks from his feet

the pants from his legs

the t-shirt from his chest

and the underpants from his crotch



he died


admitting that he was terrified

denying that that he ever had any doubts

accepting that this was his final episode

he was crying,

he was drooling,

he was sweating,

he was pissing,

he was shitting,

he was cumming, and he was going

and he was gone



he died


laughing at himself

crying for himself

when the sounds left his ears

the sights left his eyes

the smells left his nose

the tastes left his mouth

the feelings left his body



he died


feeling tired

dwelling on the past

pondering the future

desiring comfort

when the wind

tore the hair from his head

sapped and sucked the color from his skin

peeled the skin from his muscles

pulled the muscles from his bones.

ripped his bones from his being



he died


hoping it would be quick

praying it would be beautiful

begging for forgiveness

as the air left his lung

the blood left his veins

the beat left his heart


he died


snap!!!



the next time we meet we will go forwards into the past


everything and everyone from his past, his present and his future

will meet, we will greet, and will celebrate


until then,


thank you and good night.

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